![]() Tyrion: I'm not sure what I've done to offend you. Tyrion: Do you think I'm plump? Listen, Benjen, may I call you Benjen? : If you're going to be a cripple, it's better to be a rich crippl.If you're going to be a cripple, it's better to be a rich cripple. : Would it be excessive of me to ask you to save my life twice in.Would it be excessive of me to ask you to save my life twice in a week? Sometimes possession is an abstract concept. When they captured me, they took my purse, but the gold is still mine. ![]() : Better looking bitches than you're used to uncle.If he forgets, be a good dog, and remind him. The Hounds: The prince will remember that, little Lord. But first you will get to Lord and Lady Stark and tell them how very sorry you are, that you are at their service and all your prayers are with them. Tyrion: One word, and I'll hit you again. Joffrey: What good would my sympathies do them? Tyrion: Before we go, you will call on Lord and Lady Stark and offer your sympathies. Joffrey: Better looking bitches than you're used to uncle. : Have you ever heard the phrase Rich as a Lannister? Of course yo.If you deliver the message, and I live, which I very much intend to do. If you deliver a message from me to Lady Arryn, I will be in your debt. Of course, you have also heard the phrase, a Lannister always pays his debts. Have you ever heard the phrase "Rich as a Lannister?" Of course you have. Joffrey saw to that when he decided to remov. He's winning, in case you haven't noticed. You'll have an easier time drinking from that cup that you will bringing Robb Stark to the table now. Joffrey saw to that when he decided to remove Ned Stark's head. Robert Arryn: Can I make the little man fly now? : Watching your vicious bastard die gave me more relief that a thousand lying whores.Watching your vicious bastard die gave me more relief that a thousand lying whores. : The Lord of Light wants his enemies burnt.Why are all the gods such vicious c-nts? Where is the god of t-ts and wine? The Drowned God wants his enemies drowned. The Lord of Light wants his enemies burnt. : Where do I begin, my lords and ladies? I am a vile man, I confes.I once brought a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel. I made the bald men cry into the turtle stew, which I believe my sister ate. I flogged the one-eyed snake, I skinned my sausage. When I was 12 I milked my eel into a pot of turtle stew. Poor boy was flogged, and I escaped justice. When confronted with my crime, I blamed a squire. When I was 10, I stuffed my uncle's boots with goat sh*t. I closed my eyes, but I could still see her tits bouncing. I stile her robe and she was forced to return to the castle naked and in tears. When I was seven, I saw a servant girl bathing in the river. I'm not particularly good at violence, but I'm good at convincing others to do violence for me. I have lied and cheated, gambled and whored. Where do I begin, my lords and ladies? I am a vile man, I confess it.
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